So, after going through all that trouble to get from NYC to Connecticut, I decided I'd had enough and spent the second half of my vacation back in NYC. Don't get me wrong: Connecticut is a wicked awesome state (that's right, I said WICKED) — certainly better than someplace like Massachusetts, albeit its unique Martha Stewart meets Captain Ahab-esque setting. It's just that there's nothing to do outside of activites that involve crocheting, singing about Jesus, or throwing your money away on an Indian reservation. And I'm not talking about that part of Connecticut with names like “Stamford”, or “Bridgeport” — those are just sham towns that should just hurry up and secede to Long Island.

Anyway, there was much zaniness to be had in the city, and I was quickly reminded that New York is better than San Francisco in every way: better subway, better women, better smell (those street carts make all the difference), better drivers, and better bars that still have people in them at 4 in the morning. At one point, we coined the term, “misappropriation of ass”, to describe a social condition of gross inequality — you may use it as you see fit. Photos